April 12, 2014

Knowledge, Action, Happiness

Photo Credit: Tony Roberts Flickr
I'm learning to move forward.

Not only am I learning-with-my-head to move forward, I am actually moving forward.

I'm taking knowledge into practice and letting my actions follow through.

I'm letting go of frustrations before they overwhelm me.

I'm releasing anger before it consumes me.

I'm patching up past hurts as I heal and not letting them linger.

Moving forward means I am allowing God to help me, to calm me and to heal me more and more.
I'm also verbally thanking God more than I used to. 

Oh sure, I thanked Him and knew all the good things He's given me, but I am actually saying it out loud whenever I think of something to be thankful for. Which, incidentally, is quite often.

It lifts my soul to be able to move forward from the negative and feel the positivity of love and gratefulness flow through my veins.

Case in Point:
A few evenings ago I was in a social situation that ten years ago would have had me silent, nervous and embarrassed. The younger me would have felt so insecure and so freaked out that she wouldn't even have been able to string an intelligent sentence together without feeling less-than.

Instead, my fears did not get the better of me.

I stood up and walked confidently, I spoke securely and said what was on my mind. Internally I was
nervous and a little anxious but I let those fears fall like sand through my fingertips.
Photo Credit: melodi2 Free Images
Perhaps this all crept up on me without my own realization, but for the first time in a very long time I felt secure in who I am.

I felt strength in my intelligence and bold in my humour.

I felt happy.

Not just the usual happy, a happiness that sinks down deep into your skin. A happiness that makes you smile for no reason and gives you hope for dreams you never thought would come true.

THAT kind of happy.

It's easy to feel secure at home, on your own or even within the boundaries of your family or small group of friends. However when you step out side that box of comfort, your security in yourself is tested.

I now feel as if I've passed that test with an A+ and bonus credit!

This feeling won't last, I know.
Humans are not perfect and we cannot expect to feel this way every moment of every day.

We have doubts and fears and anxieties.

But the amazing secret I have know for a very long time that I am finally living out is this - I don't have to hang on to those fears. 
Photo Credit: Rainer Berg Free Images

Over and over I can let go, move on, cast down those fears and God will take them on. He will lift me out of my pit of worry and place me back on my feet, steady and strong, ready for another day with confidence at my back and surety propelling me forward.

As I said, I am moving forward.

Step by small step, this newly found confidence is creeping in and taking hold.
A confidence that embodies every part of myself, from my creativity, to my intellect, to my silly sense of humour.

I can just be me.

And I'm enjoying every moment of it!

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