How Willow the Westie came into My Life

Yes, I have always been a dog-person. Ever since I can remember I have loved dogs, wanted one or many dogs, I even used to read dog encyclopedias as a child! Yes, I was that kid.

I do love all animals and have had many, many different types of pets & animals under my care - from cows to horses to turtles to gerbils and hamsters, salamanders to garter snakes and canaries and budgies, endless amounts of fish, cats and of course dogs. Yet, dogs are and always will be, my favourite companions.

On our farm in Alberta I barely remember a puppy named Lucky. We only had her a short time before either she ran away, or (as we think more likely) she was snatched up from the end of our driveway.

My parents then got me a little black lab-cross pup I named Buffy. Though I was still quite young, I loved that dog until we had to move a while later and send her to a new home.

Years passed and many pets passed through my care until finally one Christmas my parents surprised me and my family with a cute little puppy tied with a red bow right on Christmas morning!

That was my beloved Sophie. A true and lovely scruffy terrier who lit up my life for almost 15 years. She literally grew up with me and even gave us the joy (and craziness) of having a litter of  'whoopsie' puppies. The hardest thing I have ever had to do was decide to let her rest from her aging pains.

I lasted for three months before I began looking for a new dog to enter my world.

Stress Relief - The Good, the Bad and the Scaley

Today I've been thinking about something.

Stress.

Work stress, family stress, stress in a crisis, stress with pressure from around you.

What do you do when you are stressed out?

Do you get busy and try not to think of whatever it is that is bothering you?
Or do you cry and fret and get upset at everyone around you?
Do you get quiet and not let anyone know about the lava flow of emotions that threaten to erupt at some late time?
Do you grind your teeth or get a rash or have some physical manifestation of your stress?
Do you eat or not eat or sleep all the time or stay up into the wee hours?

When I feel stress pressing in I may do a few different things:

I may sleep less and stay up way too late.
I might snack more on things that are oh-so-bad for me...comfort foods like chips, ice cream and cookies.
I know I am great at bottling up my emotions and my stress so that I appear okay, but a slightly more silent and sullen version of myself. I try to keep it all in, out of the way, not dealing with it, even though I know that heading down route just makes the journey of getting through my stress so much more difficult and bumpy.

And then...Something funny that happened this week when I felt stressed: I bought a fish.

(as yet unnamed betta)

No, not some salmon for a good and healthy dinner.

I bought my second Siamese Fighting Fish (or betta) in the past month.

(My first, Samson, has since gone the way of the White Porcelain transportation device to fishy heaven. Poor little fishy guy!)

This time I did my new friend justice. I picked up a very small glass tank that came with a light, filter and I also bought a heater. (I think poor Samson keeled over since it is actually quite cool in my house and without a heater the bowl he was in never got warm.)

Yesterday I also picked up some more pretty polished river rocks and some silk plants to give him shelter and decorate his new home a bit. Today he is active and eating well and exploring.

But back to my topic.

I didn't realize what I had done or why until I got home with the new aquarium and began setting it up.



Note: At one point in my life, not too long ago, I had many, many fish and aquariums. Eventually I sold them and got down to one, but decided when I got my puppy over 2 years ago that I didn't have time for my fish upkeep so I got rid of the last tank.

Why, oh why, did I suddenly decide to buy another one?

This past week a very close relative was very ill in hospital with the outlook seemed very bleak and the day I got word that he had passed away I went right out and bought my new fish and tank.

How did that happen?

I know now it was from a mixture of wanting to distract myself, to feel good about something and not dealing with the emotions that came with the bad news. I felt the stress of losing someone, with memories and worry bubbling up I had to do something and what I found myself doing was a bit of retail therapy and distraction.

Have you ever gone this route? Or something similar?

I can see a new marketing campaign by pet store chains now: Stressed out? Buy a Pet! They -never- add any more stress to your life...ever.

Are you still with me after all that rambling? Good.

Here's the kicker.

An important lesson I've learned this year about stress is that nothing good can come of either holding the negative emotions inside or of letting them get so entangled into your personality that they change the person you want to be.

 I've been stressed before and I held onto that negativity for so long that it changed me. I held on to it so tightly that if it had been my physical hands that were holding that stress they would have lost all circulation and started to become dead and rotting along with the disgusting pound of stress they clung to.

This summer I had a quiet and emotion-filled few moments when I finally realized that the tugging on that tightly-held stress that I had been resising and fighting against was God trying to get me to give it over to Him. It was difficult and painful and I almost felt like I had to let Him pry my fingers loose as He pulled it from my grasp, but I laid it all at His feet. The best part was that He took it. All my doubt, all my anxiety, all my anger and bitterness, He took it all and filled me with His tender love and hope and peace.

Of course I have to make that choice daily to give it over to Him, but it's working. Slowly I am learning how wonderful it is to be free of that black cloud of stress that enveloped me. I can see the brightness ahead and I can feel the peace that is beyond my own understanding.

So what do you do with your stress?
Let me tell you....if you give it over to God, He's got some amazing peace for you! 

In peace I will both lie down and sleep, for You, Lord, alone make me dwell in safety and confident trust. ~ Psalm 4:8

 Peace I leave with you; My [own] peace I now give and bequeath to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. [Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled.] ~ John 14:27

The least-kept secret of what I love best about winter - SNOW!

“The first fall of snow is not only an event,
it is a magical event”

Snow.

I love snow.

At the first flakes I see falling, I call my Mom and we gleefully look outside, sharing the joy of winter's gift we've waited for all season. I cannot hide my excitement, nor my happiness, when our Spring-like city is covered in white for a while.

I love to walk in the snow. I love the crunchy-squinchy sound it makes under my boots. I didn't like it when I was a child, it grated like nails on a chalkboard, but I've grown to miss it and now glad don my old boots and crunch away while I can.

A "Fast" Update - Four, Five & Friday!

DAY FOUR & FIVE
Thank-you to everyone who has encouraged me and sent me their love. I only ever want to use this blog as a place to encourage others and as a way to express myself.

Oh yes, it is Friday and I'm more than halfway done my 8 day fast!

I'm thanking God that my work week is ending and I can have some time tomorrow to possibly NAP!

My fast is still going strong, I've been tempted but still have held out on the solid foods. I think my brain and body have finally switched off the impulse feeling that I MUST EAT something. Yes, I still have hunger pangs and 'empty' feeling moments, but they quickly pass as I drink some water and think bout something else.

The main issue I have been having for the past 2 days has been sleep. It's taken me a long time to fall asleep lately and I wake up so very tired. I feel like I could fall asleep any moment of the day if I just put my head down to rest....Yet, God is helping me stay strong and close to Him.

A "Fast" Update - Still Standing!

DAY TWO:
Well, so far, so good with my first two days of fasting. I've had a few weak moments and some angry hunger gremlins that seem to crawl right up my throat, but overall, I feel good and am doing well.

Every time I feel hungry or the urge to get something to eat I remind myself of why I am doing this. I remind myself that I can go without for once in my life. I remind myself that God is with me and He can let this experience bring me closer to Him. This afternoon I even took any hungry moment to stop and pray for someone in my family, taking my mind off myself.

As for what I am consuming to stay standing: lots of water, it's easier at work where we have a nice cold filtered water jug, but I've also been drinking 100% (not from concentrate) pressed apple juice. Today I tried a V8 Blueberry with vegetables juice and I just could not trick my mind into drinking a whole glass. It somehow doesn't taste right to me so later I might try it with a straw to fool myself that it's a delicious smoothie.

A "Fast" Update - Meet my new little motivator!

Day...One-Point-Five
Okay, it's now been only 12 hours since I began my fast...and I am sliding down the slippery slope of weakening with mental hunger!

I know it's mostly in my mind; the human body can last without solid food for quite a while, but it strikes me at how much I am actually just craving the ritual of going to the kitchen and getting something to eat. My feet have been trying to walk to the fridge and hands want to make something, open something, heat up something! Wow, I never realized it would be this difficult this early on! (Man, my mouth is watering just thinking about it! Stop it, traitorous salivary glands!)

Yet, I am surviving. I've been enjoying some fruit juices and I warmed up some organic, low sodium vegetable broth this evening. I've been keeping myself busy, taking down all my Christmas decorations, organizing them, going through them all only keeping what I really love and actually used this year. I went down an entire box from what I usually have stored away.

Photoz ov phrendz

Greetings everyone out there who checks up on me and my life!
Here are a few photos, some random, and some not so very random...yeah.

This is my leettle friend...
(Isn't she so cute...Ooosie boo....)
These are lonely socks - the dryer monster ate their mates!
(Yes, in answer to the inevitable question, I was bored.)
These are my two buds...
This is me and M...
And lastly another pic of my dear leeltle pal!
(She is always sacked out on the bed and mostly tolerates me taking her picture and messing with her hair.)