Yes, it's true, this is my 200th blog post! Amazing!
I started this blog eight years ago, thinking it would just be a place to air my thoughts, share my ideas and maybe work out the messy innards of my complicated mind and heart.
I started using a blog before photos could even be added to a post!
Now that makes me feel old!
My very first post on September 21, 2006 was called "Growing Up & Sow's Ears", how's that for a catchy title?
It was about moving past my childish ways and thoughts, about growing up but also growing into who I was meant to be,
I look back on that post and I admire that young woman. (Yes, I know, I'm talking about myself.)
I admire her for sharing herself on this public platform, where sharing has hopefully encouraged others and inspired hope.
I admire her for her zeal and her vivacity. She has faced trials and sorrow but hasn't given up on herself, her God or her future.
I admire that even back then, she was starting to cast off her sackcloth of apathy and dissatisfaction and look around to embrace her talents and her abilities though her future was uncertain and foggy.
I admire that she continued to bear her soul, that she didn't settle for less, and that today she shines in small, subtle ways to those who know her best.
To answer the question....
Do I finally feel grown up?
Hmmm, let's see.
I feel like I am on my way to becoming a grown-up, an adult, a mature and valued member of society.
But the not-so-secret is...
I still like movies and popcorn and playing with Lego and watching cartoons!
As one 10-year old said to me after he and his brother wanted to head inside after an afternoon of playing with me in the snow, "Hey, you're just like a big kid, aren't you?"
Yes, yes I am.
I am a grown-up, but a grown-up who loves life, love and all the little things and no one can ever take that away from me!
I will always have a funny accent at the ready.
I will always be the best at making a new train track for my nephews.
I will always like bright colours...on my walls or on my clothes.
I will always choose rain and wind over heat and sun, just because I like how the wind whips my hair around and the rain makes the ground smell so fresh.
I will always be able to do all the voices from a storybook.
I will always be able to make up a song to make the time pass by more quickly.
I will always have clutter in my house that includes pretty shells and rocks I've found.
I will always be a little disorganized simply because I have so many things I still want to try.
I will always love dogs and animals and creatures big and small.
I will always love to colour, create, draw, craft, make something with my hands.
I will always make a fool of myself when I'm excited about something.
I will always wear my heart on my sleeve and in the blush of my cheeks.
I will always find the game in everything.
I will always prefer to be silly rather than serious.
I will always know those lyrics to some random song.
I will always come up with some interesting fact about where we are or what we are watching.
I will always be a nerd/geek/weirdo at heart. (yes that 200 image at the top is made up of Star Wars Lego figurines...but not my own, just for the record.)
I will always care...about my family, my friends, my co-workers.
I will always eagerly give my heart away, even if that means it comes back needing much repair.
I will always be the loudest laugh in the room.
I will always, always be able to find the fun!
And if all that makes me childish or immature...then I am glad.
Because all that...is me!
To All of You:
Thank you for continuing to read my blog.
I would love to hear from you and know how you like my posts, how you found my blog or just a little about you! Please comment below or send me an email sometime. :)